Wondering if this is a Rambo-Harry Potter mashup, because Rambo has a curiously regenerative supply of arrows for his bow, for a guy who had to cut his pack off when he got caught mid-jump from his plans.

It’s magical! All the arrows you could need!

Sure, you electrocuted him and tortured his buddy, but you killed Rambo’s girlfriend AND made him get muddy in the tropical downpour while burying her. In short, you’re fucked now, Charlie. You can’t run and you can’t hide, ‘cos Rambo’s on the rampage now, Chuck.

Rambo’s girlfriend is dead. Let this be a lesson to you, kids. If you’re ever stuck in a space-time loop in 1985 when you’re on the lam from the vestiges of the Vietcong, DO NOT WEAR A RED DRESS IN THE JUNGLE. Not even being Rambo’s girlfriend can save you. Get a camouflage gown and thank me later.

CONVENIENTLY, the Russian Lt-Col speaks fluent English and the Vietcong understand. Because everyone speaks English, of course!

The only people who think everyone speaks English are English-speakers. I once tried to order tweaks in a shawarma place in Madrid, so a Persian guy asked a Spaniard to ask a German if he could translate for us. He could not. A Frenchwoman translated for me to the German, who told the Spaniard, who told his Persian coworker to give me half falafel, half shawarma.

Man, Rambo is so bad — it’s great. Like holy flaming cheese balls, Batman, this is not good filmmaking. The riverboat explodes just before the fiery army boat crashes into it. Just totally over the top, start to finish.

Watching Rambo for something brainless.

For a moment there, I almost did a web search to find movie “flaws” on it. I’m sure some CSI nerd has done a treatise on why trajectory science means it’s impossible for Rambo to have pinned that Vietcong’s head to the post with an arrow like that, given he was crouching in the bushes. I mean, that’s some magic bullet bullshit.

But thank god I stopped myself just in time.

I’m very blessed to be housesitting for a few weeks. Here’s what it’s like in daylight. This is Vancouver Island and the Gulf Islands.

The nature here is amazing. If you’d like to watch a stunning nature doc set here, Netflix’s new “Island of the Sea Wolves” takes place a couple hours north of me, on this same side of the island (east side).

I have a view of the surrounding hills over the water, and the odd fireworks. But the moon over the water is beautiful tonight, with light clouds.

When I was young, I believed the spin when some media talked about how Do The Right Thing was anti-white or whatever the fuck they said.

But I recently realized I never gave it a chance. I was only 16 at the time, but I know now that I was being ignorant.

I also know now it’s considered one of the best movies ever on race relations in America. And Spike Lee is a national treasure.

So, I’m righting a historical wrong and watching it tonight.

So it turns out that letting my pasta dry in piles was Not Smart so I got weird clumps. This whole housesitting-kitchen thing is quite the learning curve.

Luckily I had enough unclumped pasta to get some dinner together.

Learning lessons are great but also a pain in the ass.

YOU HAVE JUST SPILLED A LARGE GLASS OF WATER ON THE FLOOR.

Is this…

I’m an avid cook so if you’re into food, you’re probably my people. I’m about to have another plate of this for dinner — homemade pasta with Bolognese sauce I simmered for 8 hours.

I did a mix of Bon Appetit’s recipe and Marcella Hazan’s. It’s the kinda stuff you make on a rainy Sunday but double the batch because it freezes great. Vermouth (dry/white) is a great wine substitute for this, BTW, & keeps better for later, if you don’t have wine around. #CoSoCooks https://cooking.nytimes.com/recipes/1015181-marcella-hazans-bolognese-sauce

HEY! Can I change from DARK MODE to LIGHT MODE?

I'm in Canada and the Mordor Darkness outside for 16 hours a day is all I need at present.

So I hear all of you are supposed to bring me candy tonight.

I don't make the rules. I'll be waiting.

Like any good Canadian, I prefer Coffee Crisp, but will accept Reese's Anything because peanut butter heals all wounds.

Apparently it's 4:15 and my productivity looks like about 2:00.

So far, this Monday has been Not Quite What I'd Planned.

I blame you.

Who has your FAVOURITE Counter.Social profile so far? I'm looking for good people to follow.

I'm currently housesitting at this insane property in coastal British Columbia. I'm debating whether to emerge from this Batcave to see the Halloween antics elsewhere, but I'm tempted to not bother.

I mean, this is from the deck. (It's Vancouver Island, a couple hours south of where the new Netflix "Island of the Sea Wolves" documentary was filmed, but the same island, and same side of the same island.)