From https://mastodon.online/@mattblaze@federate.social

"Breaking: Secret Service logs show seven visits to White House by an arborist in the last six months. Our expert analyst concludes this means Biden likely has Dutch Elm Disease."

#funny #LOL

You could be allergic to dinosaurs and never know.

#lovenow

Artwork and the model

Ladies and gentlemen, we got em.

Did you hear that the devil is going bald?
Yeah, it's gonna be hell toupee.😂

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My paper airplane won't fly.
It's just stationery.😂

Gambling debts, two divorces, and a cocaine habit had left R2-D2 nearly broke. One night, drunk on White Claws, he drives his Porsche through the front window of a Santa Monica Walgreens, losing both his legs. Finding himself on the street, he now takes odd jobs just to survive.

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#carlin
#truths

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So now we know. Just whack him with a rolled up magazine and he will behave better. Judges who are trying to control defendants would do well to bring their copy of "The Judges' Journal" with them to work.

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I wanted to marry a carbon-14 expert but all she wanted to do was date.😂