"Multiple" A self-portrait of my DID alter personalities and I. They had a say on whether I drew and inked them and allowed me to give their names. They usually are the quiet backseat drivers when I'm on here, but I think they are giving the community the greenlight to share who they are. (It's a good thing, they are especially careful about external judgement.) Es, Q, Asuka, Shade, Nomika, Danny, and myself. #CoSoArt #DID #LGBTQ #MentalHealth
To help build a clearer understanding of what DID is, it is a mental health disorder that occurs in trauma victims that have survived multiple repeated instances of such through their childhood and into adulthood. No two cases are alike in personality types or identity. It is heavily contested by Dr's in the field on whether or not it is
a real disorder, but the condition is listed in the DSM 5 for those curious for research and study. #DID https://www.msn.com/en-us/health/condition/dissociative-identity-disorder/hp-dissociative-identity-disorder
To explain the roles of each alter, I have to tap their shoulders, in a sense for permission. Danny, is the primary guardian, protector. He calls himself a field medic, from pre civil war era. When he holds the front, he reads and breathes medicine, reading and studying everything he can find on what we are living with and ways to make life a little easier for each other. He views himself as a healer, and often takes the front to help people in need we speak with. #DID #Alterintroductions #Danny
Nomika is the child among our collective, she was rendered mute around 8 years old, roughly around the time I was forced back into the closet about my transgender identity by my father. She underwent a great deal of growth over the last few years, with Danny, and Es both assisting on helping keep her safe and ensuring that she has the best of childhood we can provide her, even in our shared headspace. She is the inspiration for my drawings and artwork. #DID #Alterintroductions #Nomika
(She gets a really curious quirk in her maw when she laughs and is in a good mood. I like having her around, makes me feel like my own mom is still looking out for me.) Q is a blended role, the sensual and the hyper vigilant, she is often perceived as the altruistic part of my identity's. Hell, she's the one that nudges me along to open up more to everyone around me. #DID #Alterintroductions
Asuka is the masking self, she and Shade are connected, exchanging one for the other often when it comes to fight or flight situations and confrontations. They both are linked and are quite direct, blunt even to a hurtful point at times with their perceptions of the world and matters going on around us. Shade however, is the fighter self, she surfaces usually when I can't take anymore and pushes me to the backseat into something like a box. #DID #Alterintroductions
When they switch with me, I'm usually pushed back into a state where I cannot speak/hear/do anything. It's been explained as a form of amnesia as I often don't remember when Shade or Asuka take the front, but I have something of an unspoken agreement with all of them to introduce themselves if they come to the front while I'm online interacting with anyone to help lessen confusion. #DID #Alterintroductions
FAQ's:
It is a frightening thing to have happen, being locked away inside of your own mind. You can hear murmurs of the others there constantly, and their presences too, but the two most aggressive tend to avoid taking the front until it's the most extreme of circumstances. We are harmless, misunderstandings happen and talking them out often helps clarify what they are dealing with and facing. The only times I've been locked away as the core-self, is when we are in a fight. 1/
FAQ's: Yes, we do communicate with one another, almost like sitting at a round table facing each other. Sometimes we pace in the headspace, impatience is a common trait among us when it comes to taking a turn to speak or do anything, and we always ask for permission from the protector selves to ensure we are not surfacing at a bad time for the core, Melrose. 2/
FAQ's: No, we do not act without a clear consent from the protector roled selves. Switching takes a lot of spoons, and sometimes we can't help but surface when we heard a song we like, or see a toy or game we enjoy and identify with. More often than not, you are speaking with Melrose here, so no worry of confusion. Last night was the first time Danny, and Es, worked together to speak up and out about transphobic presences.
FAQ's: It's like sharing a home, but the walls are paper thin, and you don't get to always stay in your seat, sometimes you have to switch a seat with someone to help lessen stress/anxiety/what have you - there are triggers that causes us to switch, but it's something we're still learning about ourselves and discovering one instance at a time. It's not easy to live with this many in the headspace, at times it can be outright exhausting because of how 'noisy' it can get in the headspace.
The other day for instance, when I mentioned having white noise issues, it was them fighting over some internal matter. I tune into music and put on sound canceling headphones in order to lessen the distress I experience when they get like that. Like siblings or a family, we do have disagreements on decisions and things we do, but at the end of the day, we always come to agreements and compromises that work for us all.
If there's any further questions, we're open ears and eyes. Each of us are eager to help build understsanding about us and our presence. We know this sounds crazy but we really like you guys.
We know it can be confusing, we will try to hashtag name ourselves if we switch at the keyboard. Sometimes it's almost like automatic writing for us, only switching in part, co-conscious. But we love this community and how wide the spectrum the members are here.
@PaganMother From what I read here, I take it that you have DID? That's something I have a lot of experience with so no judgment here. And much love to you&.
@divinedeathly Thank you, and yes, we don't often co-conscious like we are today, but given the artwork we worked together on, we anted to help others understand who we are, and our roles in Melrose's life.
It’s a real honor to hear from you all. Thank you so much for sharing. 🌸
@ATXJane We thank you for taking the time to read and listen. There's a lot that we struggle with on a day-to-day basis, but we manage okay working collaboratively. #Taurussystem
@PaganMother I've known a few people with DiD before. It's a way to cope with the trauma you've all endured.
This world hasn't been easy on any of us I think, and pressure can be mutagenic to the soul.
I'm a safe person and an ally
Es is the maternal self, she loves and cares for everyone and nurtures everyone that allows her to help. She is something of an otherkin, I suppose, she calls herself a dragon. Very rarely does she step to the front, but when she does, she usually has something really important to say or address. She has a keen awareness of patterns in behavior and word choices, more so than I take notice of. #DID #Alterintroductions