And it’s supposed to be pissed. Not posses.

For the sake of your family. Make certain that these things are on paper. So there is no question and no argument as to what your wishes are.

My mom literally told me; “I don’t care what you do, I will be dead.”

This does not help your children that are of differing faiths.

#fuckcancer

Fin

.

#4

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#3

.

.

Ugh #2

I might be wrong. I might have let emotions lead here. But this posses me the f^€k off.

My mom passed away yesterday at 1705.

She was surrounded by her 3 girls.

I told her this battle was lost, the war was lost. It’s time to call it.

We sat around for a few hours and talked about margaritas and Cards Against Humanity. We talked about all the things that made her happy.

All while she laid in her bed. Waiting for the mortuary to come get her and body.

#fuckcancer
#lovefamily

#fuckcancer

As much as I love my mother. I am absolutely tired of watching her suffer.

I feel like I have been sitting death watch for 3 days only for it not to take her.

My mental health is suffering. It has been since August (diagnosis). November since treatment failed.

I’m sick that I feel this way.

My sister is stuck in San Diego

My niece lives there.

Not this exact location, but still.

#BeforeAndAfter

Hospice delivered the comfort care kit today.

The sisters are not taking it well. The oldest to too focused on her own life, the middle is still scarred form our dad's passing.

This is my third family that I have helped pass with the aid of hospice.

I feel like I am old hat at this. Which says a lot.

Nobody should ever feel like they are alone in this. there are resources. Should you need them.

#fuckcancer

Just an update on mom. It's been a time, but I didn't feel the need to burden everyone with my struggle.

She had 0 energy yesterday. Today, she didn't want to get out of bed, just wanted to "rest."

Anyone that has had to see a loved one die from the dreaded disease of cancer knows that the end is nigh.

I have friends and family that are seriously concerned about my well being, I have been here since day one.

I am truly OK with this.

I love my mother, I don.t want her to suffer any longer.

Someone else likes nachos.

#dogsofcoso
#homecooking

Just a puppy doing puppy things.

#dogsofcoso

I have been lacking in my doggie birthday greetings.

Happy Birthday Kevin. #3 on Sunday.
#dogsofcoso
#gsdofcoso

#dogsofcoso
#gsdlove
#iykyk

No love like it in the world.

Oh, has it been a time. Nanny cam installed. Sleep is an after thought. She cannot communicate for shit. I have no clue what she wants me to put the water in. I really don't. She is having trouble drinking from a cup she has been drinking from for years. I hate not being able to fix this. I have been able to fix anything up to this point. I can't do anything now.

I hate this feeling.

#cancersucks
#IAMLOST

Made the call for hospice and science care.
These are some of the final calls I should have to make. Once she has passed, Science Care will come pick up her body and take what they need for science, cremate the remains and return them to us with a nice note and memorial. I'll add it to my grandmother's.

I have to wait for the sisters to approve the choice to make certain they do not object to her choices.

Fuck, put your ducks in a row for your kids, please. Then put that row in a folder.

I need to vent.

My mom is dying of cancer. There is no coming back from that. I have accepted that.

I just vented to my sisters what I went through to get her to bed. It’s been rough the last few weeks.

She has no clue how bad she is. She has no pain. I’m grateful. I have been with her 24/7 since diagnoses in August.

I am making the call for palliative care tomorrow.

What gets me is the texts. Some people can be completely tone deaf.

Again, just venting.

Thank you all. ❤️❤️❤️