TROUBLE GOBBLE GOBBLE
Retired educator / military officer(Army Colonel) - Current Ops Div Chief (G333), HQDA / married / political progressive / ED.D. and Army War College Grad. 3277
Joined Nov 2017
THE GOOD LORD KNEW WHAT HE WAS DOING WITH ME, HE MADE ME STRONG, BUT NOT STRONG ENOUGH TO BE A WOMAN
Ken-Dogger: Hey Mama Cass, what you doing with Brutus and Mongo?
Mama Cass: Teaching them how to follow the lead
KD: But they're gonna be MEN
MC: What the hell does that mean?
KD: Well, Men...they, uh, they TAKE the lead
MC: Leaders start as followers, that's how they learn.
KD: Oh, teaching the yin and yang I see...
MC: Yes, you boys stay out of our way, Mamas will make them whole.
Ken-Dogger: Morning Scratch, that’s you boy.
Scratch: Was wondering that, I didn’t recognize me.
KD: Mirrors are great, we get to check ourselves out.
S: Oh, like checking to see all our stuff is in the right place?
KD: Yes, but when we go out, peeps don’t often see just our mirror image.
S: So, they see more?
KD: They see our actions, and our words, and they see we’re more than a mirror image.
S: Wow, and here I thought I just had to look cute, better work on my personality.
SPELLING...THE BANE OF MODERN EXISTENCE
"Dude, it ain't that hard, the rule is I before E except after C..."
"Jeez, Ma, I'm not sure this one is ready for spelling..."
IT SHOULD ALWAYS BE ABOUT ENDING THE SUFFERING
Ken-Dogger: What’s all this noise?
Nellie: I’m protesting…
Shelley: Yes, and I want him to stop.
KD: So this is how you’re handling it.
N: Shelley wouldn’t let me take a knee…
S: That’s right, I like upping the ante.
KD: Many do up the ante, until we get beyond protesting, losing the veracity of it all.
N: So we keep fighting?
KD: Until you find another way to end the suffering.
DIRECTIONALITY...IT CAN BE BEFUDDLING
"Hey, check this out, took me most of the morning Ma, but I've finally got both ears going in the same direction...
What you say?
To a Beagle, this is no small feat."
As Richard Pryor once mused, "why you guys hold your stuff?"
"You've done taken everything else..."
"What you talkin' 'bout Willis? I'm checkin' cause you see what they did to the tail...Tell me, can you see 'em, or did they take them too? Well, are they there?"
STILL TRYING TO FIX IT
Morning Fixers,
Ken-Dogger: Hey Quigley, why the look?
Quigley: Did Rudy G get paid?
KD: What? You’re concerned about that? Isn’t that Rudy’s problem?
Q: It is, it’s also ours…
KD: Not sure I follow…
Q: Well, it’s really more about the End of a Story, we never seem to get there.
KD: Does leave stuff open and easily escaped, doesn’t it?
Q: Yep, it’s just a series of ‘new stuff’ anymore, cycle seems broken.
KD: Then we need to get about fixing the cycle.
THEY OFTEN TELL US ABOUT THE NECESSARY RESTRICTIONS
"Okay, okay, okay, I know I said it before...But if you'd help me out of this box for the 20th time, I promise, well I hope to promise, the 21st time won't come soon, well, soooo soon....
Ma, you might also consider not putting these fun things in places where I can get to..."
BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU MODEL
Ken-Dogger: Hey Brutus, you getting up?
Brutus: (Opens one eye, closes again) ZZZZZ
KD: It's okay, I'm up and I can't get back to sleep
B: ZZZZZ
KD: Did you hear me?
B: ZZZZZ
KD: Wait, did the Mikster tell you to ignore me?
B: ZZZ, nope, I just watched her, learned it all on my own
KD: Et tu, Brutus, et tu...
Ken-Dogger: What up Fredo?
Fredo: Did you see that case of Stolen Valor yesterday?
KD: No, I didn’t, what do you mean?
F: That Executive Order on Social Media, that’s what I mean.
KD: Oh, that’s just Trump feeling aggrieved.
F: And he was aggrieved because Twitter stole his valor.
KD: Did finally create decisive action from the White House.
F: Yes, just sad, the Vainglorious get action, the masses get graves.
KD: Yep, when valor saves one to the exclusion of 100,000, it is stolen.
Hoo-hoo that smell
Can't you smell that smell?
Middle Pup: I know, I know Ma, I'm supposed to be posing for this great puppy pic, but....well, I just farted and I'm laughing cause my peeps are tryin' to keep a straight face..."
Ken-Dogger: Hey Venkman, what up?
Venkman: Dude, concerned about morality.
KD: Really…
V: Well, there are two strands now…Morality and Two-Days Hence Morality
KD: Two-Days?
V: Well, there are peeps who respond to moral outrage, and then there are those who wait for public response and then two days later, they get to moral outrage.
KD: So. there’s an incubation period?
V: Apparently…For those who aren’t firm on what morality is…
KD: And for those whose morality blows with the wind.
DISCRIMINATION...IT'S NOT A FORCED CHOICE
"I know, I don't know how it happens either...Some of us are brown on the outside and white inside, some of us are white on the outside and brown inside, some white and white, some brown and brown."
"So,...it really doesn't matter what color on either side?"
"Nope, never did, unless you choose to use color to discriminate..."
DEFINING MASCULINITY
Ken-Dogger: Morning Princess
Princess: Morning KD, let’s go on a walk.
KD: Let’s just wait for the Mikster, she enjoys the walks too.
P: You just don’t want to be seen with me do you?
KD: Well, you ARE a bit froufrou.
P: Really, I’m impacting your masculinity?
KD: It is silly, my masculinity isn’t that fragile.
P: Didn’t think it was, so we’re walking?
KD: Yep, masculinity is about doing what’s right.
Ken-Dogger: Hey Jacque, did you hear about America’s newest status symbol?
Jacque: No, but I think I’m gonna…
KD: Shush…Apparently, we’re beefing up backyards, making them their own fun park.
J: Wow, more places to segregate us huh?
KD: Would appear that way, you know we closed community pools rather than integrate them.
J: Yep, and now we’re closing off homes. Maybe we weren’t meant to come together.
KD: No, we were…We just have powerful forces working to keep us apart.
ON POINT
"Look at me, LOOK AT ME...
I'm not a killer, people make me a killer, just like a gun makes a willful murderer..."
FILTERS AND NORMS
Morning Filtered Ones,
Ken-Dogger: Hey Pepe, do you believe that lady?
Pepe: Which one?
KD: The one on the phone in that store…sheesh, sharing her life story
P: Has she not heard of filters?
KD: I don’t know, but there clearly wasn’t one…Did I need to know her relationship foibles?
P: Peeps have been inside for a long time
KD: So, we need to clarify inside and outside voices again?
P: Apparently, we’re reestablishing norms.
HONOR VETS
Ken-Dogger: Rambo, you ready for Memorial Day?
Rambo: I am, what is it?
KD: A day we remember those who gave their lives in defense of American freedom.
R: A most solemn day indeed. What are you doing?
KD: I’m going to be reverent, to salute my comrades, and to vow to never forget their sacrifice.
R: America was built on sacrifice wasn’t it?
KD: It was, freedom sometimes demands sacrifices…
R: Hopefully, Americans can honor that today and all days.
KD: Yes, hopefully…
WHAT'S IN A NAME?
Morning Peeps,
Ken-Dogger: Hey Bailey
Bailey: Dude, we gotta talk…Hearing bad stuff about my name.
KD: Not sure what you mean?
B: Why am I called Bailey?
KD: We thought it was a nice dog name, and we also like the alcohol, so it worked twice.
B: And the neighborhood dogs call me LUSH…
KD: Bailey, life is a series of decisions where either you gut it out or you give it up.
B: …And I’m the give up consolation?
KD: Yep, Bailey and Baileys gets me through.
WHEN WE BREAK UP FAMILIES, WE GET USED TO BREAKING UP FAMILIES
"You want me?"
"You gotta take both of us, nobody separates the litter further..."
"This is what Puppy Power looks like..."
TROUBLE GOBBLE GOBBLE
Retired educator / military officer(Army Colonel) - Current Ops Div Chief (G333), HQDA / married / political progressive / ED.D. and Army War College Grad. 3277
Joined Nov 2017