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I feel absolutely horrible, a stinking cold has bestowed itself upon thee! But it's only a stupid bug, I'll get over it!

I'm concussed with a splitting headache! Last night in bed, hubby was asleep and as he turned over his huge fist came flying through the air and hit me really hard on the head! Pain was excruciatingly! Have taken some Nurofen Express!

i am craving cinnamon-sugar toast something awful, but am i willing to get up from my snuggly spot to go and make it? Decisions decisions...

Last night on my left foot I accidentally broke the toe next to the big one and it's soddin' painful! But I've had broken toes several times over the years and it'll eventually heal up!

Happy Penguin Awareness Day 20 January 2023!

Oh, what an evil cow I am! Last night in bed I was flat on my back with my cat, Wopsie laying on top with her bum towards me, tail over my face! I had a deep desperate urge to POKE her up the bum! I didn't because A: I wouldn't do it anyway B: I want her to carry on being my friend C: I don't want to spend the next 3 months in hospital! You have no idea just how much willpower it took me to keep my hands under the duvet for 5 minutes!

When you finally finish work at 7pm after being there since 8:30am, you're absolutely knackered and have to drive to Morrisons for shopping. You only go in ''for a few of the essentials''....yoghurts, washing up liquid, something for that night's dinner and pain killers...and come out with a trolley full!

@SassySherry7 @LittleFatty

It's a little known Murphy's Law, "If you think you're alone when you burp/fart, you're never alone."

@LittleFatty

I had an intern once who burped and said, "it's just a little air seasoning". 😂😂😂 That kid was going places.

@LittleFatty

I'm a teacher, and with me, it's passing gas. I usually let one out after my last class left, but every once in a while there's a straggler!

When you're at work and let out a universe-shaking BURP, forgetting there's a customer in the room...!

The left side of my mouth is painful and my gums on that side are a bit swollen after my hubby accidentally hit me in the face last night while he was asleep! Have swabbed the gums in Boots Clove Oil and taken some paracetamol!

I went to Pets at Home and bought this little mouse for my cat, Wopsie. Pull the tail and it buzzes and runs over the floor. Paid £3.00 for it but Wopsie refuses to have anything to do with it, so as a rodent fan I adopted it and called it little Nosey!

It's 8:19 pm and we're back at work for a few hours!
I think we're weirdos as well as workaholics!

Our cat, Wopsie woke us up last night! My wardrobe has 2 doors and 2 draws. We woke to what sounded like a big loud knocking on our front door, we switched on the lamps and jumped out of bed…only to find Wopsie was playing with the metal dangly knobs on my wardrobe drawers! She was merrily banging away!

Good news is, I managed to go last night without having terrifying nightmares!

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LittleFatty

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