Will it really hurt less over time? Does time truly heal? If only there was a quicker and more effective remedy
@stueytheround wow, the resemblance between the physical and emotional hurting/healing… thank you for sharing with me. I’m working towards healing and it has been very difficult. This helps a lot.
After my father died in 1998, I was told this by a lot of people but over time I realized that no, it doesn't hurt less, per se. I found that the pain is always there, it just changes how it hurts and for how long.
All these years later and I'll still have moments where I feel like I'm back in the hospital watching him die, but those moments are no longer as frequent and typically I'm able to switch over to happier memories.
@see_the_sus I truly appreciate you sharing this with me, the hurting is really taking over my daily life/productivity and friendships. I need to remind myself to switch over to happy memories, thank you for that.
You're very welcome. ♥️
I've never been one to sugarcoat life but I do try to be as gentle as possible.
I was the first in my group of friends to have a parent die & I think if I hadn't been married & had his support, I'd have not coped well with my dad's death. None of my friends knew what to say & so no one said anything, just went on w/ life.
Then I got divorced in '03 and lost all 95% of people I thought were my friends. Again, people don't know what to say so they pull away.
@Lilacm I guess you are talking about a relationship or job that you held for a significant time and due to things beyond your control, it is no longer a source of joy or very difficult to feel fulfilled.
I was released from contract (made redundant) in 2012. It was tough adjusting to job hunting having worked 12 years in 1 organisation. There were times when I missed my workmates, the fixed events that marked the year and the opportunities it gave me.
@Lilacm 2/ Them my sister found a great bloke, he proposed and the date was set for the Wedding. It was the first milestone event I had been able to attend of my Sisters, my job meant I had missed many Birthdays, her Graduation from High School and University, even Church Confirmation, but I made it to her Wedding and we now have a holiday together each year.
I still miss that job, but I focus on what I can do now, because looking backwards doesn't help you prepare for what comes next.
@Lilacm
I'm not sure it hurts less, but over time, it hurts *differently*.
A physical example of what I mean:
In 2015 I broke my leg really badly. The first pain was horrific. Extreme. As I healed, the pain was bad still, while my bones knitted themselves together and all my flesh slowly regained movement.
Now there are scars which remind me of that moment and sometimes it still causes me pain, but it also reminds me that I have survived.
It's not all that different with emotional hurt.