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The two most beautify words in the English language.

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Dear ABC: If you wait until tomorrow morning to talk about the debate, it's not a "real time reaction." Just FYI.

What's the over/under on Trump talking about the border in his closing statement?

"Putin would eat you for lunch."
"Oooh - like Hannibal? Would it be like Hannibal?"

THE GLOVES ARE OFF!

Pop quiz, hotshot: Is the a question to which Trump did NOT talk about the border?

THERE IT IS

THEY'RE EATING THE DOGS!

PUBLIC HEALTH NOTICE: Please, DO NOT, under ANY circumstances, make tonight's debate a drinking game. DO NOT take a drink every time Trump tells a lie, evades the actual question, or calls someone a playground name. YOU. WILL. DIE. Also do not take a drink for every over-used Trump phrase, like "believe me," "everybody's saying it," "can you believe it?," "I have the best/finest/most,", or "They say to me, 'sir'," among others. Again, YOU. WILL. DIE.

What Kamala ought to do for the debate is get a really loud tally counter and click it every time the convicted felon tells a lie.

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It's Ginger Cat Appreciation Day, so... thanks, I guess?

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Today was "National Ride the Wind Day." I misunderstood, and apologize to everyone in my car after my lunch of beans.

And sometimes I remember that God gave me a middle finger, and therefore must want me to use it.